Next Monday will mark 10 months that we’ve been homeowners.  To say it has been a rollercoaster would be the understatement of the decade.  We’ve been up and down and happy and sad and frustrated and excited and exhausted and pushed to our limits. But I haven’t lost that glimmer of hope that tells me it will all be worth it.  Slowly but surely.

I don’t think I could list all of the things I’ve learned since we started if I tried.  So here are the most important lessons I’ve learned in the last 10 months, in no particular order…

1.  Always get a clear and detailed contract in writing.  Always.  Because our contractor is also a family friend, we let this one slide.  Big mistake.  ALWAYS get it in writing, even if it means going with someone else.

2. It WILL take longer and cost more than you planned.  Enough said.

3. Choose your priorities.  Your budget will never go as far as you think (see #1).  In our house, we chose to have a few rooms professionally painted, but only the trim was done in the other rooms.  We painted those rooms ourselves, and saved a lot of money.  We also plan to paint the porches ourselves, and re-tar the roof to the front porch, among other things.  On a project our size, you can’t DIY everything, but you can find ways to cut corners.

4. Compromise is unavoidable.  But if you have to compromise, compromise on aesthetics.  Never compromise on the structural things that make your house safe and functional.  Stabilizing the electrical, fixing the plumbing, installing new air ducts…these things matter a whole lot more in the long run that my beloved pink couch.  (I can’t believe I just said that!)

5.  Invest in the long term.  We chose to install brand new heating and cooling units that are incredibly efficient.  The cost up front was big, but it will save us money long term.  The brick steps and cheek walls are another place that we decided to splurge.  But we think they are totally worth it!  One thing that most people would never know we invested in was our bathroom tile grout.  We chose to go with an epoxy grout instead of the regular grout because it is so much more durable, and virtually stain-proof and water-proof.

6. Take a breath.  Any renovation, whether you’re living in the construction zone or not, will take a toll on your relationship.  That also means, if you’re lucky, that you will come out on the other side stronger than ever.  Just remember to breathe.  You’re in this together.

7. Measure twice, cut once.  Ok, my dad taught me this a long time ago, but it’s so true.  Always double check.

8. Reduce, reuse, recycle.  I can’t tell you how much money we have saved by reusing old wood and bricks.  We’ve also reused old doors and moldings.  These really keep our home streamlined, and saves us a lot of money!

9. Think ahead.  I’m not saying you have to make your house wheelchair accessible, but you should think ahead to future obstacles.  For us, we decided to leave the downstairs bathroom a full bath so that our parents can stay downstairs comfortably when they get older, or one of us if we have a surgery or injury that prevents us from climbing the stairs.  We decided to add the tub to the upstairs guest bathroom instead of just a shower so that we have a place to “wash our babies” one day (as my mom likes to say).

10. Blog about it! You don’t actually have to start a blog, but be sure to at least keep a journal and take lots of pictures throughout the process.  You’ll be sad you didn’t later on. One day, hopefully many years from now, when I’m frustrated over something about our house, I can look back and see how much time, money, energy, blood, sweat, tears, and love we poured into it and remember the reasons why.

Have you been through a home remodel or renovation?  What were the most important lessons you learned?

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